WHAT WE WRITE ABOUT TELLS US WHO WE ARE BY CRISTIAN MIHAI

What we write about tells us who we are…

A few hours ago Chuck Palahniuk shared this on his Facebook page:

“What is the issue that is eating you up? What is the personal fear that you can’t resolve and you can’t tolerate? Are you getting old with fucking NOTHING to show for it? Then, write Invisible Monsters. Are you worried that your brain or talent isn’t capable of creating anything interesting or unique, and you’ll die and rot and be forgotten – failing everyone you love? Well, then write Diary. My point is, use the story to explore and exhaust an issue of your own. Otherwise, you’re just dicking around, playing “let’s pretend.” If you can be ruthless and honest about your own fear, you express something that other people can’t express. You can resolve your own anxiety – through research, discussion, experiment – and that freedom is what brings you back to writing.

What could you never talk about in a million years? Then, write about that.”

I agree with everything he said.

In a way, I always find it funny when people tell me that in order to be a writer, you need a vivid imagination. Or drugs. Or both. But the truth is, that you don’t.

Then there’s this simple question: Why do we write? And why do we feel at times that only the written word can express our deepest fears and emotions, our love and pain and hatred; basically everything we can’t speak out loud.

Truth be told, writing is a liberating experience. It’s like shouting in a crowded place. It’s a way of attracting attention.

In real life, I don’t really like to tackle philosophical issues very often. Actually, I don’t like to talk too much about life, money, love, and other important issues such as the physical impossibility of death in the mind of someone living. More so, I usually make fun of those issues.

Why do I do that?

Maybe because I’m shy, and that’s why I’m a writer in the first place. Or maybe because I know that the written word has a better chance of surviving the cruel passage of time. I’m not sure, but I know that most of the times, in real life, I do my best to act as shallow as possible. Serious conversations kind of bore me.

I just listen. I smile and nod and act like I’m interested in what everyone’s saying, and then I go home. I go home and I start to write. That’s when everything changes. Because I write about what I love or loved once, about what I hate, what I’m afraid of, what I’d like to see changed in this world. I write about ambition and passion and courage and pain, and there’s nothing for me to be afraid of.

Not the people I shamelessly turn into characters, not the real tragedies that I turn into words… because the same thing I do to myself. Every experience, every kiss, every heartbeat gets dissected countless times. Some of them find their way in my stories. And that’s a very painful process.

A lot of writers out there, if asked, will say that writing isn’t easy. But it’s not because of the rules you have to obey, or the conventions, or the need of a vivid imagination. Writing isn’t easy because you have to relieve the most painful moments of your life, over and over again, and then you have to write them down, hoping that they’ll matter to someone else other than yourself.

 

MASON COLLEGE,FESTAC IN PICTURES:OUR FANTASTIC YEARS OF SELFLESS,DEDICATED AND SOUND EDUCATION!(7)

…we visited Covenant University (above) and University of Lagos to whip up our students interest in higher studies…one of our areas of special interest were their libraries…and many of our students eventually attended Covenant University as a result of these frequent visits… locations where there were impressive displays of books like The Jazz Hole and Glendora in Ikoyi were also visited…Glendora is one of our major suppliers of books for over 10 yrs now…

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…thank God for our parents!…what could we have done without them!…shade, our ex-student and daughter of one of them(third from right) just graduated with a first class degree in economics from university of lagos…the father actually informed us…we say congrats to shade and her family…shade this is wishing u God’s blessing on the job u picked out of the two offered to u by financial institutions on the spot!….amen

…most of those in this pic answered the call of their alma mater in the past few days…mason had over 160 of its ex-students as friends on fb within just two days!..

HOW MUCH OF WAEC DO NIGERIANS REALLY KNOW? (PART 3)

A.   OVERVIEW:

The Council  conducts four categories of examinations:

1. International Examinations such as the WASSCE, SC/GCE 0/Level and the HSC/GCE A/Level;
2. National Examinations such as the Senior School Certificate, Technical, Business Studies, and Common Entrance Examinations;
3. Examinations conducted in collaboration with other
   examining bodies, such as City and Guilds of London Institute, and the Royal Society of Arts;
4. Examinations conducted on behalf of other examining bodies, such as University of London GCE examination for non-West Africans, Scholastic Aptitude Test and Graduate Record Examinations for Educational Testing Service, Princeton, USA and JAMB Examination in countries outside Nigeria.

In Nigeria, however, WAEC has shed all but one of its examinations; the West African Senior School Certificate Examination (WASSCE), which is for both school and private candidates.

PIC: WAEC’s newly acquired state-of-the-art Microplex solid 90E Continuous Laser Printer for embossing candidates’ photographs on certificates. Council hopes to completely eliminate impersonation in it’s exams with the embossment of photographs on certificates.

B.  RESULTS AND CERTIFICATES

1. Conditions for the Award of a certificate

The West African Senior School Certificate will be awarded to a candidate who enter’ and sits for all the core subjects and two or three elective sub|e«;is. Certificates will he awarded on the basis of subjects offered. The core subjects are as follow:

Nigeria Core (Compulsory)
English Language
Nigerian Language
Mathematics

One Science subject (Chemistry,Physics’ Biology)
One of either Literature in English, Geography or History
Agricultural Science or Vocational Subject.

2. Format for Reporting the Results of the WASSCE

Results sheets will be issued to show results in the examination us a whole and will also indicati: the standard reached in each subject taken. There will be six grades in order of merit from A to F, with grades B and C further sub-divided. Grade A being the highest and Grade F the lowest. The first five Cedes
which will be designated A, B, C, D, E will be grades of pass. The sixth grade will represent a failure.
The interpretation of the various grades is as follows:

Al – Excellent
B2 – Very Good
B3 – Good
C4 – Credit
C5 – Credit
C6 – Credit
D7 – Pass
E8 – Pass
F9 – Fail

Results sheets will be sent to Heads of Schools without fee or application. The results sheets will show the results in the form of grades as stated above.

3. Conditions of Issue

The certificate issued is and remains the property of the West African Examinations Council at all times.

(1) The certificate should be kept in a safe place.
(2) The West African Examinations Council will not issue any copies of the original certificate.
(3) Any alteration on the certificate renders it invalid.
(4) The certificate must be surrendered to The West African Examinations Council on request.

4. Confirmation of Results

(1) On application, and after payment of a fee which will be determined from time to time by the Council a confirmation of statement of candidate’s performance will be sent to the following authorities:

(a) Institutions of Higher Learning
(b) Public bodies
(c) Prospective Employers (Reputable organizations)

Confirmation of statement of Results are. however. NOT issued to individual candidates or persons.

(2) If a candidate is required to submit a Confirmation of his/her results to any of the organizations as listed above, he/she should forward the prescribed fee and two passport-size photographs to the Council, giving the following details

Name (in full and as used in the examination)
Month and Year of Examination
Examination Index Number.

(3) The passport-size photographs should be endorsed at the back by one of the following indicating that the applicant is the bonafide candidate who took the examination.

(a) Head of a Recognized Educational Institution
(b) An ordained Clergyman of good standing
(c) A Barrister/Solicitor
(d) Civil/Public Servant.

(4) Any Company or Institution wanting to confirm the examination results of its employees is required to submit to the Council photocopies of the documents presented by the employees together with two passport photographs endorsed at the back by an official of the company and the prescribed fees

Only applications accompanied by all the requirements above will be processed.

WAEC ESSAY WRITING: 45 ERRORS FROM NIGERIAN VERNACULAR TRANSLATIONS (PART 3)

A COMEDY OF ERRORS: EXTRACTED FROM ACTUAL ESSAYS OF SS3 STUDENTS,WAEC EXAMINERS’ REPORT OR VARIOUS ENGLISH TEXTBOOKS SUCH AS “BRIGHTER GRAMMAR”  & “COMMON MISTAKES” ( PART 3)

All the following statements are wrong.Can you correct them and send your corrections to us or finalize with your tutors?

….mason college prefects and  staff member Mrs Owolabi…confident and sure students!…

1. “He slept little”
2. I want to peace/piss/piece                                                                               
3.  “I don’t think”                                                                                                     
4. How is daddy and mummy                                                                                
5. One of the boys were                                                                                        
6. “Last two months”                                                                                              
7. Even if you see fuel                                                                                            
8. The country’s currency still had it’s stand                                                     
9.  Come and see things with your eyes
10. You cannot find corruption in his hand
11. My father can’t see money to pay my school fees.
12. Your mouth will not touch it.
13. There is no market nowadays.
14. John refused that he has done it.
15. He has a polygamy family.
16. I wanted to see you but I was not chanced
17. He earns only N5,000 only 
18. I’ll come back before 1 hr.
19. We entered into the classroom.
20. Are you following the game?
21. John has not come also.
22. According to my opinion, he is right.
    

    …taking part in drama,singing,and many co-curricular activities listed on our write-up on summer school will help students improve in making public speeches or taking parts in debates…(above and below)

23. These two boys help one another.
24. These three boys help each other
25. Who of these boys is taller?
26. Whom do you think will be chosen?
27. He wears the same coat as I wear
28. There was a fight among two boys.
29. George and myself were present.
30. It is a secret between you and i.
31. My brother is taller than me.
32. He talks as if he knows everything.
33. I had finished the book yesterday.
34. He thought he can win prize.
35. He asked me what I am doing.
36. He insisted to go to London.
37. Their house is opposite from ours.
38. I have written the letter with ink
39. The messenger will arrive just now.
40. My brother hasn’t much books.
41. I don’t have time to see you today.
42. I congratulate you for your success.
43. I look forward to see him soon.
44. Please give me one other book.
45. There isn’t no one here who knows his name. 
    

    …see comment in the pic above

WAEC SPEECH ESSAY AND PUBLIC DEBATES BY NIGERIAN SECONDARY SCHOOL STUDENTS (PART 6)

.POINTERS FROM RE-BLOGGED ARTICLES FOR REFERENCE BY TUTORS (CONTINUED  FROM PART 5)

…mason college students acting as t.v reporters of a live event…other students were watching for confidence-building and having fun while speaking publicly…

Public Speaking: What to Do About Those Butterflies!

Most public speakers will tell you that they suffer from being nervous and having butterflies in their stomach before they are due to deliver a speech.

So if you were thinking that you were alone in this… Don’t worry… you aren’t.

Good speakers will tell you that having butterflies is a good sign. By this they mean that you haven’t become complacent or blasé and that because of that you will probably deliver a better speech. The trick they assure us is to “get the butterflies swimming in formation”!

So… how do we learn to keep our nerves under control? I think it is important to realise that nervousness seldom comes from not knowing your topic well enough. It comes rather from the “thought” of actually presenting it to a group of people. It is more about the fear of the unknown than anything else.

Here are my four recommendations to help control your nerves.

1. Practice. As we just stated most of our fears come from the “unknown” factor… What if something goes wrong with my presentation. What if I forget what I was saying? What if?… what if? The best way to control this sort of thinking is simply to put some more practice in and don’t modify your speech too much. You could also get someone to give you a prompt & practice starting your speech from different places within your speech. If you can do that – you will be fine – it is then just a matter of giving yourself a mental pep-talk just before your speech.

2. Breathe. When you are nervous, your breathing becomes more rapid and more shallow. In some ways this physical response re-inforces your nervousness and can even intensify the symptoms. This is how people get full blown anxiety attacks and hyperventilate. If you think of it this way, then it is logical that you need to slow your breathing down. The simple act of “focusing” on your breath and consciously slowing it down by taking deep, regular breaths automatically makes you feel calmer and more relaxed. You could even build this into a routine that you follow before you get up to speak. Deepen your breaths and feel the power and the confidence that it gives you.

…co-curricular activities for building stage confidence were not toyed with at mason college…

3. Smile. Once again nervous tension evidences itself in physical symptoms. Your mouth is dry, you could lick or purse your lips, and even clench your jaw or teeth together. This tension can cause havoc with our vocal cords when we start to speak, making our voice a little tight and squeaky or make you feel that you have a frog in your throat. The easiest way to release this tension is a great big beaming smile. This will not only let the audience warm to you immediately and relax them… Some may even smile back. It will work to release the tension in your throat and neck and allow you to start to speak with certainty and projection right from your opening words.

4. Change your Body Language. When we are nervous we hold the tension in our body as well. We may fiddle with our fingers, clasp them tight or jiggle our legs. You may tend to hunch your shoulders and lean forward a little, almost trying to curl your body into the nice, safe “foetal” position. Needless to say, none of this presents a confident picture to the world. The good news is that we can fool our bodies, just by changing the way we are sitting or standing. If we simply stand up straight and tall, shoulders back and head held high you will instantly feel better and the difference in the picture you present to the world is 100%.

So, to banish your fears or at least start to control them, a combination of all 4 techniques WILL work for you. Practice your speech, take deep regular breaths, greet your audience with a wide, beaming, genuine smile and walk tall, proud and confident to the podium!

You CAN master those butterflies and then you will “knock their socks off” with your next speech.

By Adele Howell Pryce

WAEC ESSAY WRITING: 50 ERRORS FROM NIGERIAN VERNACULAR TRANSLATIONS (PART 2)

A COMEDY OF ERRORS: EXTRACTED FROM ACTUAL ESSAYS OF SS3 STUDENTS,WAEC EXAMINERS’ REPORT OR VARIOUS ENGLISH TEXTBOOKS SUCH AS “BRIGHTER GRAMMAR”  & “COMMON MISTAKES” ( PART2)

All the following statements are wrong.Can you correct them and send your corrections to us or finalize with your tutors?

…mason college graduands who mastered their grammar before leaving for higher studies…all those in picture are today university graduates …except one in white at the center studying medicine at Korle Bu Teaching Hospital, University of Ghana…

1. He went to school on Saturday to know maths                          
2. I don’t have time to see you today.                                               
3. Do you like to see my shoes?                                                          
4. He took a high mark in English.                                                       
5. My English book is with my brother.                                             
6. I shall sleep early tonight.                                                                 
7. Leave the other end of the rope.                                                    
8. I was hearing her sweet song.                                                         
9. The ship was drowned in the ocean.                                              
10. Leave me to get my book.                                                                
11. The teacher accepted to go with us.                                               
12. We have always won your school in football.                               
13. Sir, can I go home to get my book?                                                  
14. Please borrow me your book.                                                           
15. I want to lend your book from you.                                                  
16. Tables are usually made from wood.                                               
17. Edison discovered the gramophone.                                                
18. I am now persuaded of his honesty.     
    

    ...typical mason college poetry appreciation class…

                                                

19. He revenged his brother’s murder.                                                   
20. I never interfere in his wish.                                                               
21. She has put on black shoes.                                                                
22. I wear my cloth in the morning.                                                         
23. We hanged the picture on the wall.                                                  
24. The murder was caught and hung.                                                    
25. I am going to lay down for an hour.                                                   
26. Divide the doughnuts between you three.                                        
27. There was a fight among two boys.                                                     
28.  I cannot buy it for such a price.                                                            
29. He lives at Abuja or at Enugu.                                                               
30. I spent my holiday in Calabar                                                                
31. Only I and my brother are present                                                     
32.  I have read the two first chapters                                                       
33. He neither speaks English nor French                                                 
34. I only saw him ones  after that                                                             
35. From where can I buy a good wristwatch?                                         
36. Our examinations will begin from Thursday                                            
37. He has got black hair                                                                                    
38. You can’t make him to understand                                                           
39. You must be careful in the future.                                                             
40. On Sunday we go to the church                                                                
41. The Gold is a precious metal                                                                      
42.  Better go home at once.                                                                               
43. “I am coming, I just want to get to Agboju quickly”                                                                                                                         
44. I enjoyed during the holiday                                                                      
45. “Give me chance, let me pass” 
46.  He is stronger than everybody.                                                                   
47. I told them not to make noise                                                                       
48. I play violin but not piano.                                                                             
49. Can you supply me all I need?                                                                        
50. He has not replied me yet
    

 

WAEC SPEECH ESSAYS AND PUBLIC DEBATES BY NIGERIAN SECONDARY SCHOOL STUDENTS (PART 2)

POINTERS REBLOGGED FROM ARTICLES FOR REFERENCE BY  TUTORS (CONTINUED  FROM PART 1)

  B.  Overcoming The Fear Of Public Speaking – Calm The Butterflies In Your Stomach!

 The problem with communication … is the illusion that it has been accomplished. – George Bernard Shaw

 Know this: Overcoming the fear of public speaking isn’t hard. You should be relieved to know that nobody has ever died from giving a speech. Feeling like you’re going to is another story…

 Almost everyone is nervous the first time they get up in front of an audience. Just standing at the podium can be intimidating enough without actually having to speak! Shaky voices, trembling knees, and beads of sweat are usually par for the course for inexperienced speakers.

 Why do you think there are so many books, articles, videos, and public speaking organizations, all dealing with overcoming the fear of public speaking?

 Because most of the people around the world are as petrified of public speaking as you! Rest assured you are not alone.

 As Mark Twain noted: “There are two types of speakers: those that are nervous and those that are liars”.

 The good news is that there are many simple steps you can take to help yourself overcome the fear of public speaking. You can learn to send the darn butterflies in your stomach back to their cocoons!

Tip #1: Focus on your breathing. Learn some breathing techniques. Do that every day and every moment you can.

 Most new public speakers find themselves short of breath during their first speech or presentation. You may feel like you’ve just run a marathon. In fact, you may be so nervous you forget to breathe!

 Some of you will start to hyperventilate and breathe faster and faster. Audience members may start to question whether they’re in the wrong theater. They’ll check their ticket to make sure it reads “public presentation” and not “horror play”.

 One of the first things you can do is focus on your breathing.

 Breathing properly will reduce your anxiety and relax your neck and shoulders.

 Force yourself to take several long deep breaths and hold them 4-5 seconds. Then exhale slowly, letting out all of the air in your lungs.

 Tip #2: Memorize the first few lines of your speech or presentation. Getting off to a wrong start is a surefire way to make you fear public speaking even more.

 New speakers are most nervous at the very beginning of their speech. Staring at the audience members for a few seconds can seem like an eternity. This depends on which side of the podium you are standing!

 This is why, in overcoming the fear of public speaking, it’s important to memorize the opening of your speech or presentation. Practice the first few lines as many times as it takes for you to recite them from memory.

 If you don’t do this, you may find yourself freezing up. Your mind may go completely blank. This can ruin your entire speech; you may become too distressed to even continue.

 Remember, beginning your speech is the most difficult so concentrate on your opening lines!

 If you are able to speak the first few lines of your presentation, you’ll be surprised how much easier it will be to remember the rest. You’re one step ahead in overcoming the fear of public speaking.

Tip #3: Bring point-form notes with you. Use them when necessary during your presentation.

 Even great speakers will sometimes bring notes up to the podium. Not everyone is blessed with a photographic memory.

 New, inexperienced speakers will usually have a harder time remembering what they were going to say. Saying their speech in front of their bathroom mirror is usually much easier than repeating it in front of a large audience!

 Don’t be afraid to bring notes to help you during your presentation. Remember, your goal is overcoming the fear of public speaking. You may find yourself getting stuck during parts of your speech or forgetting a few lines. If this happens, discretely glance down at your notes for a little help.

 Make sure your notes are brief and in point-form. Don’t write out your speech word for word. You want to be able to find relevant notes quickly and easily. You don’t want to have to shuffle through page upon page to figure out where you are! This will not inspire confidence in the audience and will make you even more nervous.

BY   Liuhua SHOKO WATARAI

C.  Butterflies flying in the stomach when speaking?  

Fear of speaking in front of the public is the number one fear, above death and disease. Many people admire those who have the courage to speak fearlessly in front of the public. Professional MCs do it all the time and we often have people coming to us to say, “How I wish I can speak like you!”

 But do professional emcees speak without fear at all? Do they go up the stage and can speak just immediately? All people have stage frights, no matter who. There were times where we too came across moments we shook our legs, our bodies shiver and butterflies seem to fly in the stomachs.

 The trick is to know HOW to overcome all these symptoms. Calmy palms, sweating, body shivers, legs shaking and even butterfly stomachs are all normal when someone is faced with anxiety and fright. The key is to hide it as much as possible and overcome that moment.

 If you know anxiety makes your hands shake, try not to hold papers and show the audience your fears. If you know you sweat or have calmy palms, equip yourself with a handkerchief to wipe it off and tell the sweat “STOP coming out!” Identify your own ways to calm yourself and use it when you have stage frights.

EXTRACTED FROM http://promptmc.com/articles/65-butterfly-stomachs.html

WAEC ESSAY WRITING: 50 ERRORS FROM NIGERIAN VERNACULAR TRANSLATIONS (PART 1)

A COMEDY OF ERRORS: EXTRACTED FROM ACTUAL ESSAYS OF SS3 STUDENTS,WAEC EXAMINERS’ REPORTS OR VARIOUS ENGLISH TEXTBOOKS SUCH AS “BRIGHTER GRAMMAR”  & “COMMON MISTAKES”

All the following statements are wrong.Can you correct them and send your corrections to us or finalize with your tutors?

1. He came late due to an accident.                           2. A large supply of toys are expected.

3. The number of pupils in the school are increasing. 4. I read it in one and half hour.

5. Nothing is left.All are lost.                                         6.Tom as well as George are coming.

7. He complains that his wage is low.                                   8. They are now using new machineries.

9. There were thunders and lightnings.                               10. The fire caused many damages.

11. His luggages are at the station.                                          12. Furnitures are often made of wood.

13. I  have no appetite to study.                                       14. What other musical organ can you play?

15. Is there a chance for me in this bus?                                    16. I saw a book on the ground.

17. Strong air blew his hat away.                                                   18. What is the cost of this watch?

19. The man took his woman with him.                         20. The streets are full of men and women.

21. Only five individuals were present.                                      22. I have a poetry to learn by heart.

23. Our travel to Abuja was pleasant.                                 24. He was in the center of the street.

25. Can you find the middle of the table?                              26. You have a good cause for coming.

27.  Telling lies is a very bad custom.                                        28. The roads of the town are narrow

29. You should go to your house now.                                    30. Many new homes have been built.

31. He has been sick for over a year.                         32. They have less or lesser books than i have.

33. He found one ring in the street                                      34. Abuja is further than Ibadan to Lagos

35. My older brother is Musa.                                                         36. My oldest brother is not here.

37. I have read each book in the library.                           38. Everyone of the two boys was wrong.

39. The two of them has cars.                                                40. The group of girls have nice shoes.

41. Last night i went to bed lately.                                                  42. He scarcely comes to see me.

43.  His uncle is presently in London.                                    44. The messenger will arrive just now.

45. The baby is learning to walk step by step.                             46.  I hear that he is not so rich.

47. He likes food too much.                                              48. I was too much surprised by the news.

49. The river has overflown over its bank.                                 50. He is learning at Mason College.

NOTE:

What we have above is the first part of a 3-part list which seems to get worse in English usage as we move towards the third and final list.

Good luck as you attempt to correct them.

.

MORE ESSAY QUESTIONS FROM WAEC FOR FURTHER PRACTICE!

TAKE NOTE OF THESE INSTRUCTIONS FROM WAEC!

1. Answer ONE question only.

2. All questions in the essay section carry equal marks.

3. Your answer should NOT BE LESS THAN 450 WORDS.

4. You are advised to spend about 50 minutes on this section.

LATEST ESSAY QUESTIONS ( WAEC/MAY/JUNE 2012)

1.You have spent about six weeks in your new school.Write a letter to your father telling him about your experiences so far.   (informal letter)

2. Write an article for publication in your school magazine on the dangers of keeping bad company in school.    (article)

3. Activities such as debates,drama,and excursions are now rare in schools in your country. As the Senior Prefect,write a letter to to your principal suggesting the revival of these activities and pointing out what students stand to gain from taking part in them.   (formal letter)

4. You are the Chief Speaker in a debate on the topic: “Violent video games should be banned”. Write your argument for OR  against the topic.   (debate)

5. Write a story to illustrate the saying: “Where is a will,there’s a way”    (story telling)

OUR SUGGESTION?

1..pick one of the topics indicated above

2..go back to read our notes about the nature of  that type of essay topics

3…check past Q/A booklets for similar answers

4….then write yours

Good luck.

 

 

OUR MARCO POLO JOURNEY:THERE WE GO AGAIN!

 

THUS FAR,SO HARD!

Education remains the best option for empowering not only children but adults alike for contributing to the social , economic and political fabric of the society. Although, parents are aware of the importance of education and are desirous to give their children the best, many of them are unfortunately uninformed about the best way to achieve their hearts desires. The inability of students to apply appropriate study/examination techniques has also led to repeated failures in both internal and external examinations causing frustration and disappointment to the students and their parents.

EDUPEDIAWEB is prepared to meet the needs of  students, parents, staff members and their schools  in their quest for educational excellence. It is an innovative compilation or various write-ups prepared by EDUPEDIA   CONSULTANTS or extracts from the works of various specialists to guide students, parents and tutors. Articles selected have been carefully divided into various sections for both students and staff.

The initial work we are putting out at the moment deals with ENGLISH LANGUAGE for WAEC/NECO/JAMB exams. This is to show that we prepared mainly for students of Nigeria or for those taking WAEC exams on the west coast of Africa generally .However we have been touched by the interest and so much love shown to us and our articles by people from almost 50 other countries we never dreamed of. That to us is huge and beyond all our expectations and calculations

Our genesis included some wise cracks at necessary educational reforms of education in our country. We started from the Federal Ministry of Education (FME) not out of spite but for being the most important organ in the body. There is no rhyme or reason for separating FME for stinging attacks because education is everyone’s business and not government officials alone. We shall therefore continue to point out in a rather polite manner what is wrong with FME. Thereafter we shall turn to States Ministries of Education and Education Departments at LGAS/LCDAS. From there it shall be the turn of school managers and their supporting staff members. And lastly it shall be the turn of parents themselves. The more the task ahead gets defined the clearer things seem to get. But the clearer things seem to be getting  the more the top of the mountain to be climbed seem to be going into the clouds!

But let’s step back a bit. A derivative from the articles on English Language is called NOVELS SUMMARY SCHEME and what it says is what it means. Its aim is to encourage students improve their grammar, spellings and punctuations through very active reading and summarization of novels. We shall give detailed notes on how it should be operated including the three options available for gauging students’ summaries.  In case a school wants to evolve the scheme through its library we shall also give suggestions called “operational guidelines” and new library rules and organization they may need to make the scheme successful as it was with our students.

One fact we overlooked was that a derivative can give birth to another! But now we also know we have not just one baby derivative but  many of them as we shall show below! Coincidentally each of the derivatives has at least three or more sermons on the mount attached! All of them will subsequently be published! What a heavy bag we obviously have on our backs for a journey which daily looks like that of Marco Polo. Yet we  are just beginning and are very far from the end of our Asia . Things are looking so hard but definitely not impossible.And the beauty is that we are not just writing what we are publishing.Most have been produced and used with students over many years.What we just do is “tweak” them for the net.But a short digression please….

APOLOGY

The fact that English is not our first language do get to us from time to time.In some cases we do get easily carried away  by the excitement of  pushing the “publish”  button.You know what we mean,don’t you?  Later the excitement cools off and our error antennae go up  making us see some glaring errors here and there.But we eventually always get round doing “clinical” checks of published articles! We do re-read each of our published posts and many of these errors do get cleared or corrected..So kindly forgive us when we post 3 to 5 articles a day and some of them have some sources of annoyance.We will attempt to balance quality with quantity over the period of our Marco Polo journey and  do assure you that over  a short period  time  quality will eventually take over.

DERIVATIVES

Before the short turn off  our highway we were on “derivatves” These are tributary articles  taking their sources from other articles which are themselves branches from the original  source. Many times their objectives might have only glancing connections to those of the original source.For instance,we started with articles on English Language and will eventually publish articles for  setting up a NOVEL SUMMARY SCHEME (NSS) to help students improve in certain areas of English Language.But the NSS itself  is better operated using a well-stocked and  organized library.From practical experience we know a bit about managing a library and  will automatically lead to some published articles on that.But in order to ensure some comprehensiveness we will publish other articles  already written on other uses of the library by students. One that is obvious  is  using it as a source for compiling school projects! So there we go again! The reason why we are Marco Polo strikes again through giving  of notes on how to source and  write projects.Hahaha! And we shall be suggesting over 100 topics schools can use   as students’ projects and how to get teachers  act as mentors. In addition to this we shall also publish articles to ensure that tutors don’t regard  this important job as unnecessary burden.But is that all? No not at all. Students need be taught or tutors given notes on the nature and methods of writing reports too! Or should they not? oh yeah you guessed right! We shall be publishing articles on those too!  May be you never heard about the guy called Marco  Polo. We hope you will get to love him  through reading our “derivatives”  Please sit at table with us and… bon appetit !…

Thank you.

PIC:Nigeria’s Minster of State for Education, Barr. Nwike honored recently by one of our universities…

ROMEO AND JULIET: CAST-A-BALL!

This gallery contains 6 photos.

…no one knew these were ever going to be published…may be some  photoshop  job would have been ideal!… …Mrs Iyeye, tutor in charge of literature  and a former member of the Nigerian National Troupe…ever dedicated to her job crouching on … Continue reading →

OUR BLOGGING JOURNEY! STILL A LONG WAY HOME,STILL MANY MILES TO GO!

…so we are about to discuss blogging and food…right?…not exactly!…if not,then what is this post about?…it is  to confirm that we got to our 1000th landmark view yesterday…just as predicted…we had celebrated with wine instead of lager…to my regret because my throat has a fiercely guarded, long-term ,friendly tradition with criminally cold pints…all the same it was nice to go to a very small decent and neatly decorated bar/restaurant for an impromptu review of our blog’s first 30 day!s…

…the said 30 days  had been hectic and on certain occasions we got lost in our own translations!…the main problem was getting out our past write-ups from different files instead of  flash drives…luckily we have a super secretary…a gem of a lady…hardworking, business-minded,sometimes too officious…who kept us on our toes…she ensured we kept up the posts day and night until we reached our moderate landmark…God bless Ruka  and Vic her partner in the secretarial office!…as both of you read this when u get into the office in the morning you’ll smile and we hope you understand  that this is our way of saying thank you!…okay?…

…so  back to the restaurant  and the cold sweet wine in our glasses…we all knew that our blog was literally only at the beginning of a Chinese journey of 4 billion miles!…we had previously educated ourselves…to some limited level about how to increase traffic,web sites versus web blogs…about SEO’s,bounce rates,tags,interlinks…etc etc…phew!…it was like being back in primary school  learning alphabets,short words and their meanings…one thing  became very clear to us…we still have a long way to go…but were we going to withdraw from  the challenges cropping up?…especially getting to know we were like new-born babies just out of maternity wards?…were we going to ask ourselves what it will take to get very massive following on twitter or heavy climbing on our FB walls?…then the marines landed!…

…the food orders came out of the kitchen and we were all shocked!…”who ordered all these?”…Ruka!…argh!…what will our wives say if “a few lagers by the boys”  were not going to make us eat at home?…anyway,not to waste precious time, we settled down to eating just a bit and  getting the remainder packed  to take home…nothing strange about that in naija!..but despite this fail-safe time-saving artificial measure for not getting filled up we spent more time discussing blogging than we bargained for…why?…

…we discussed many matters including the following

1…should we expect Google money through adsense or not?…was it going to be worth anything?…if so how were we to go about it  since we can’t get it through wordpress?.

2…how do we upgrade our blog to a full.com on wordpress if  there is a  problem between paypal(which wordpress insists on) and naija…at least we have seen one upgraded naija thread  with videopress capacity which we certainly love to have…also so many plug-ins we’ll like to install and make use of..hahaha!…

3…it was important to interlink our articles asap which will mean going through all our posts to decide where the spots for the links should be…

4…we however agreed that the content matters and that our biggest traffic which we expect from naija will probably be yielded by  relevant external marketing in our national media…and relevance certainly meant the level of utility to our people not SEO’s or interlinks!…

…we left the bar very happy about another decision we took…that is, to get a journal going  within our posts to tell the history of our blog and to keep in mind that there will be those who are going to follow our footsteps in naija and for whom such compilations might become like a Bible in future…it was,therefore,not a bad evening after all!...

WAEC ENGLISH LANGUAGE: DOUBLE TROUBLE,CAULDRON BUBBLE!…A NIGERIAN TRAGEDY OF ERRORS?

A COMEDY (TRAGEDY?) OF ERRORS.

..sometime ago we posted about 750 pairs of words which were termed as “troublesome”.. we also indicated the existence of other lists of words that are of special WAHALA to Nigerian students…these were tagged as having links to direct translations from  over 200  ethnic languages in our country…

1.PAIRS (WORDS AND PHRASES) USUALLY INTERCHANGED CARELESSLY BASED ON OUR INTERPRETATION OF EVENTS

…fatal/serious…lovely/loving…popular/widespread…(nothing like  “popular” rumor…second day/following day (the “second day” of an event spread over a period of time might not be the “following day”)…strong meat/ tough meat (nothing like “strong meat”)…sweet chicken/tasty chicken (chicken cannot be “sweet” unless sugar or honey is added…etc…we will be grateful if tutors explain the others found below as we have done above…it is possible that foreigners might not understand how such words could be interchanged…but you and i know better…or don’t we?…

…accept/agree…borrow/lend…buy/pay for…carry/take…continue/keep…convince/persuade…discover/invent…drive away/dismiss…terminate/sack…follow/accompany…forgotten my book in the car/left my book in the car…hear/listen… hear/smell…hire/rent…hope/think/wish…lay/lie…learn/teach…like to/want to…maintain/repair…make/take…marched on/trod on…met my absence/found me absent…to name him/to nominate him…neglect/ignore …occasion/opportunity …overrun/run over…pain/hurt…promise/intend… remember/remind…rob someone of something/steal something from someone…scrape/shave…size/fit…took 5th in the race/came 5th in the race…take in /conceive…conclusively /in conclusion

2…COMMON SPELLING DEMONS BY NIGERIAN STUDENTS LISTED FROM THEIR ACTUAL WAEC/NECO EXAMS SCRIPTS!

…in the pairs  below the actual spellings submitted by student are followed by the ones intended!…

arguement/argument…conduicive/conducive…dinning/dining…grievious/grievous…grieviances/grievances…nonchallant or non-chalant/nonchalant…occassion/occasion…prevailent/prevalent…priviledge/privilege…querry/query…mechine/machine…displine/discipline…carring/carrying…principle of our school/principal of our school…farmily/family…we are greatful for the favor/we are grateful for the favor…pest/paste…west/waste…offsprings/offspring…quite/quiet…bording/boarding…writting/writing…laboratry/laboratory…intergrated/integrated…dady/daddy…taught/thought…section/session…park/pack…live/leave…march/match…site/cite…sit/seat…maintanance/maintenance … nationalse/naturalise…throne/thrown…given.giving…proof/prove…seize/cease…believe/belief…been/being…burder/boarder…economic/economy…fate/faith…taken/taking…loss/lost…order/other…owe/own…sight/site…this/these…sale/sell…safe/save…phisics/physics…no/know…there/their…price/prize…
…tutors are please to explain how these spelling errors can bring down the total score of a students despite having the points to use for writing an essay…

Thank you.

NIGERIAN WAEC/NECO ENGLISH LANGUAGE EXAMS: SPEECHES,GREAT OR SMALL!…

NOTE:These notes are  for exams and real life situations

A. Definition:

1. We must assume that they are not the same as arguments or debates; all the same, a speech has many things in common with most of the other types of essays.

2. A speech could even be a combination of narrative, descriptive and discussion essays.

B. Layout:

3. It also follows the standard layout of introduction, body and conclusion.

C. Language & Style:

4. The audience should be told at the very beginning, what you are about to tell them

5. Make use of anecdotes and candor to grab the audience’s attention.

6. Challenge a common misconception to grab some attention

7. Admit disappointment about something they already know

8. Tease the audience a bit.

9. Promise to be brief.

10. Play with the title of the speech a bit if you have to

11. You can plan the body of the essay to be chronological, or cause and effect, or in numerical order, or problem- solution, geographical or alphabetical in approach (ask your tutor to explain these to you with examples)

12. For the conclusion, use quotations, refer to the introduction of your speech, ask for action from your audience, or end with an anecdote. Be realistic and candid. End with optimism or with a strong rhetorical question.

13. Use short words and sentences. Avoid jargon or euphemisms. Avoid vague modifiers and abbreviations or foreign language, or sexist language.

14. Simplify your phrases and sentences.

15. Use tripartite division (usually by dividing what you want to say into three or 3-in-1)

16.Use parallelisms: For instance “If a free society cannot help those who are poor then it cannot save the few who are rich” or “ Where there is hatred let us show love. Where there is injury, pardon. Where there is discord, union. Where there is doubt, faith and where there is despair, hope.

17. Use imagery; be specific, vivid and colorful.

18. Use inversion of elements e.g. “Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country” or “ we would rather be big fish in a little pond than little fish in a big pond”

19. Use repetition e.g.”We must give peace a chance. We must give peace a chance. We must, we must.”

HOW TO DELIVER A SPEECH:(NOT FOR WAEC /NECO EXAMS BUT USEFUL FOR SCHOOL DEBATES)

20. Determine what you want to say, focus on a subject and note that you can include everything in one speech.

21. If you at loss for a topic, then build your writing/speech on who?/what?/where?/when?/why?/how?/what if? basis. These questions should lead to some interesting ideas.

22. Assess your audience by their age, size, gender ratio, economic status, educational background, political orientation, culture, beliefs and attitudes towards religion and their familiarity with the subject matter or topic. Note, however, that it is not smart to give the same speech to different audiences.

23. Plan a speech that is appropriate to the setting e.g. a speech at Sheraton hotel for doctors on a conference vs. a speech for doctors who are on strike.

24. To research a speech you can use your head, library, available statistics from Government, university sources, the internet, reference books and encyclopedia.

25. Use statistics for impact as well as quotations, definitions, comparisons, contrasts etc.

26. Make your speech short and simple.

27. Avoid trite openings or burning statements with your introduction.

28. Focus on the body of your speech with these methods

• Chronological order
• Cause and effect analysis
• Numerical order
• Problem-Solution approach
• Geographical order (east, west, south, north)
• Alphabetical order ( list of communities or departments)
• Psychological order (will they be friendly or hostile audience)

29. No matter the method used, make sure you follow the order smoothly. Do not get sidetracked.- Use transitional phrases to help the audience  follow your ideas such as “ moving to the 3^rd point” or “ Now let us take a look at…”, “Switching now to the western division…”, “ In addition…”.

30.For conclusion simply sum up what you have told them. Add no new thoughts. Your conclusion can however be made memorable by ending with a quotation, referring to the opening of your speech, urging them to take action, ending with an anecdote. Be realistic, candid and sincere with your conclusions. You may also end with optimism or a strong rhetorical question.

PAST WAEC/NECO EXAM ENGLISH LANGUAGE QUESTIONS ON DESCRIPTIVE/IMAGINATIVE/NARRATIVE/STORY-WRITING ESSAYS FOR PRACTICE(3)

ESSAY QUESTIONS FOR PRACTICE

NOW PRACTICE WITH THE ESSAY QUESTIONS BELOW AND MAIL YOUR ANSWERS TO US. WE’LL LET YOU KNOW ASAP AREAS NEEDING FURTHER WORK OR ATTENTION…GOOD LUCK.”

1.Write a story, real or imagined, which illustrates the saying: “Make hay while the sun shines”

 2. Write a story ending with the words: “indeed it was a blessing in disguise”.

 3. Narrate an experience you had heard about that illustrates the saying: “Where there is a will there is a way”

 4. Tell a story that ends with advice: “Cut your coat according to your size”

 5. Narrate to your classmates an experience you had or heard about the saying: “You reap what you sow”

 6. A vehicle in which you are traveling was involved in an accident and several passengers including yourself were injured. Describe to sympathizers who have come to visit you in the hospital how the accident happened and what followed.

 7. You were amongst a group of students from your school who went for an excursion to places of interests in your country. Narrate to your classmates who did not go what you saw in at least two of the places you visited, and how you have benefited from the experience.

 8. Tell a story which ends with words “I have had to live with this stigma for the rest of my life”

 9. You have been involved in an accident in which very many of your friends criticized your role. Narrate the accident to a close friend and defend the role you played.

 10. Write a story which ends with the words: “I really agree that a patient dog eats the fattest bone”

 11. You witnessed the campaigns that preceded a Local Government election in your area in which the favorite candidate was defeated. Give a vivid account of the event before, during and after the election to one of your friends, explaining why you think the candidate lost.

12, Write a story in which you where personally involved, ending with: “If I knew he was that kind of person, I wouldn’t have gone out with him”

 13. Narrate the story that illustrates the warning; “Look before you leap”

 14. Tell a story that ends with the words: “It was a bitter experience, but I learnt my lesson”

 15. You have just spent your holiday in another part of the country with a friend, narrate your experience to other friends describing what you found interesting about the customs, food, dress and way of life of your hosts.

16. Narrate an experience you have had or heard about which illustrates the saying: “Honesty is the best policy”

17. Write a story in your school magazine beginning or ending with the sentence: ”I wish I had never met this man”

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

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HOW TO WRITE DESCRIPTIVE ESSAYS FOR WAEC/NECO ENGLISH LANGUAGE EXAMS

 DESCRIPTIVE ESSAYS:

A.Definition:

1.A descriptive essay is   a  SHORT STORY used to explain or expose a particular sequence of events. It is usually used to conjure up an image of a person, place or object in the mind of those who do not know what or whom are being referred to. Even though descriptive essays are based on observation, the writer’s creativity in the use of adjectives can infuse new life into the event to make it more interesting or entertaining. The difference between this form of essay and the narrative is that, information in the descriptive essay is static, while the latter is focused on dynamics.

B.Layout:

2. Descriptive essays should follow a natural order of what is being described e.g. the description of the human body should start from head to toes.

3. The introduction of the descriptive essay should be a definition of an object or concept.

4. The body of the essay should focus on the details, functions, parts of the object, the characteristics, the habits and the appearance.

5. The conclusion should be a general statement to sum up what is to be learn from the object or process.

6.To describe a person: Remember the name, appearance, habits, peculiarities and achievements.

7.To describe an object: Remember the definition, exterior to interior parts, functions and objectives.

8.To describe places: Remember the name, location, size, special factors and landmarks.

9.Arrange the essay according to the main stages of the process being described and build your explanation around this frame work (2 above).

10.State the purpose for each stage of the process but make sure each stage leads to the next one.

11.Use 1^st person’s point of view if related to personal experience, 2^nd person’s point of view for relating another person’s experience, and 3^rd person for an impersonal exposition of professional or technical topics. Choosing one of these perspective is mandatory.

C.Language & Style:

12.Usually, the tenses of verbs in descriptive essays take on the present but often in  a passive form (ask your tutor to explain this to you with examples). You may also need to use technical words depending on what you are describing; i.e. using medical terms when addressing an audience of doctors etc..

10 REASONS FOR LOVING SPAMS AND THEIR BUTTS!

WHO IS DECEIVING WHOM?

…dear fellow bloggers,as we were writing this, akismet reported  we had 240+ spam hits!…on 72 posts mainly related to matters which obviously hold nothing for them if they were not bots!…this number of course was an increase indicating they had doubled since the week before!….. hnnnmm! …ain’t that nice to know?…so they came,those lilliputians gathering at each of our gates…to us newcomers it could  only mean one thing…we are getting some attention!… and that,i guess, is what every blogger wants…should we get swollen-headed or just give a thank you response?….but then how was our response supposed to be?…after a while  we fired two exploratory  posts across to them specifically quoting their words and thanking them for doing a good job!…yes,a good job cause we have been feeling merry reading them and having so much fun from the level of intelligence in those posts…they are not so useless after all…if you are feeling down spams can guarantee you a few smiles by  irrelevancies,and incongruities to your posts!!!….but sometimes they can also exasperate your claim to human decency and regular behavior…now thinking backwards its thanks to akismet cause of the choice to accept spams or just push them back into space!…akismet is such a  good sentry at our gates   for our sanity…thank God!

…and to spammers reading this, let’s point out a few things   we see as  silly or lacking any claim to intelligence in your spams…

1…we posted a notice to our old students and u spammed thanking us for “the excellent points” we made and what you learnt from there “after searching the internet for 9 hrs”…what could have been your concern with certificates of our students is beyond our imagination…how much of what could you have “learnt”  reading a notice for a school alumni?…hzhyhx!…you made us laugh in greek!…

2…we posted a pic of students dancing then your spam came along saying it was just what you and your sisters had been discussing for weeks…hahaha!…was that prophecy or hallucination?…

3…you post Spannish “thank u” messages to our blogs teaching English Language…so considerate  of u!…init?…

4…there is a particular family that is really in love with our site and here are their names…they were all probably born on the same day in the same hospital ward!….beton, betonu, betonowe  betonowe-h, betonowe-s….lovely jazz quintet!…always love their concerts on our blog!,,,

5…then along came this HMV group…almost 60 of them… saying the same thing …about being new,just floating around,then coming across our site and  Lord Jesus!….all that blah,blah,blah!…were they that desperate for internet mileage  or just too careless to care?…all having the same yahoo link  but floating  different funny usernames!…

6…then one of them wanted us to be in touch…hahaha…we laughed merrily to almost choking point !…do these people know how many  of such proposals we get from our own people in Nigeria per week?…so they have not known this is a Nigerian site?…no respect at all?…no fear that these naija guys can turn the table against them considering   our well-known abilities?…do spammers know that fear and respect rule in a mafia fiefdom?…

7…we guess putting up two posts thanking spammers for their comments  must have encouraged them too…they wanted to improve their net rankings, we guess…so why not a little help to our friends we thought!…then they all decided to come down to our site like ants for thanksgiving!…what a laugh!…have u ever enjoyed something so much it made you cry?…but have you also ever been mad at something so bad you couldn’t sleep at night?…that is twisting Brandy a bit  we know,but have you ever…have you ever?…of course those two posts will kiss the dust after  we finish posting this!…

8…my dear spammers,just some friendly advice…run away from education sites!…they will  eventually be bad news to you…teachers hate vague unintelligible comments!…if u do it once they might think u were having a bad day or running stomach…next time they might also think you were perhaps not listening…but repeating the same irrelevant unintelligible remarks through your bots will certainly require some spanking which u are now being lined up for!…

9…oh yeah,sometimes your behavior is similar to that of ants… their colonies being bloggers’  sites..when you smell or see some crumbs for ranking mileage, you all  bolt to the site like u are having ants Olympics!…some of u even give excuses for losing your breathe for a few days but that you were back to continue from where u left off!…hahaha… to spam the site to death!…but to be candid u are good entertainment especially as u are unaware that your tracks are tailor and techno made to lead you to an expected outcome which is what this write-up is all about!…

10…but are you sugar ants or what?…signposts and signals were put along the tracks to make you think twice or more…many times the phrase “bots and all” were used to  let u know it was time to stop wasting your time but we guess the sweetness of having your names reflected as one of those commenting fermented your senses into some state of drunken stupor…right?…well,our people have a saying for that…”the market is ended and the market-sellers are on their way home”…henceforth all your spams which are usually neatly packed by akismet will also neatly end up completely wiped off without even getting into the thrash cans……so we say thank you for the fun while it lasted…and to our very good friends such as gautreaux,despain,lista de email and other names too silly to mention its bye,bye…see you in space!…

LIFE SKILLS: LEADERSHIP BY EXAMPLE

 

 

…senior school students showing their juniors how to do it!…

 

SHAKESPEARE IN MOTION:ALSO PRESENT AT THE ROMEO AND JULIET BALL!

LIFE SKILLS:SHORT STAGE PLAY BY JUNIOR SCHOOL

…STILL AT THE MR MASON/MISS MASON COMPETITION…